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Because domestic violence can shatter family life and relationships, Diakon Family Life Services - Capital
Region offers a domestic violence treatment program called Choices.
Based on the Power and Control Curriculum developed by the Domestic Abuse Intervention Project in
Duluth, Minn., Choices includes four individual sessions and twenty-six group sessions with both
educational and experiential components. It teaches such skills as:
- Anger management
- Conflict resolution
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- How to take a "time out"
- Assertiveness
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In addition, Choices identifies the choices men must make in order to become non-violent. These
include:
- Focusing on their own behaviors, rather than their partner's behaviors
- Acknowledging and become responsible for their controlling and abusive behaviors
- Re-evaluating attitudes towards and beliefs about women
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- Learning the communication skills needed for a cooperative relationship
- Taking responsibility for the cycle of violence in all their relationships, including those with their children; and
- Choosing non-violence as a basic life stance.
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Clients contact Diakon Family Life Services to schedule an individual, two-session appointment for intake
and assessment. If the assessment indicates the client can benefit from group, he is given a
start date. Otherwise, different recommendations may be made.
After 13 sessions, the client participates in an evaluation of his progress. This is done in a
one-hour session with staff. If progress is poor, this will be discussed in the individual meeting.
At the end of the 26 group sessions, the client participates in a one-hour final evaluation through
which he is either given a completion or a recommendation for an extension of treatment.
Payment for services is due at the time of each session. Fees are based on a sliding scale.
Domestic Violence includes a broad range of controlling and abusive behaviors, based on the belief
that men have the right to control women. It is not limited to physical abuse. Women who receive
such treatment from their male partners are being abused, whether or not they are being physically
hit.
Men who are abusive have learned the beliefs and tactics involved in controlling their
partners. Because these beliefs have been learned, they can be unlearned.
In the Choices group, members are asked to examine and then change such erroneous core
beliefs as:
- Women should be subordinate to men
- Family violence is a private affair and should be settled in the household
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- Men have a right to control their female partners
- Apologies and promises are all that is needed to end the cycle of violence.
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